By Dr. Alison Schmidt, CEO of UNCONVENTION
During my graduate studies, I founded and ran a successful full service consulting management company. For more than 20+ years, I worked with C-suite, executives, boards, teams, and individuals in various dynamic environments.
While starting a company involved a lot of sacrifice, late nights, hard work and challenging obstacles, the rewards were numerous. My clients were mid-market to large enterprises across various industries. Our main product was strategic planning creation all the way to execution. And I loved it!
However, down the road, motivated by less than favorable changes in the economy, I felt it was time for a new adventure in the form of a career move. I thought: “I have over 20+ years of consulting and coaching experience, a great resume and references, have maintained a successful company and have earned my Ph.D., so how challenging could this possibly be?” As it turned out, VERY challenging!
The emails of rejection mounted. More times than I could count, I was told that I was ‘overqualified’ or given a flat out ‘no’. Despite my own recent training in psychology, I couldn’t see any new doors opening as others closed. I began to internalize these rejections and disappointments as a measurement of my self-worth.
I lost myself in the application and interviewing process, allowing it to control me and define my own abilities. My self-esteem dropped so low that I entered a deep depression and even developed an anxiety disorder. Other than clearly “not good enough,” I didn’t know who I was anymore, or who I was supposed to be.
I started to ask questions like: Who am I? What is my purpose? What do I want to accomplish professionally? Who do I want to be on a personal level? The only thing I knew for sure was that the person I was looking at in the mirror wasn’t me. My witty personality faded, and I was no longer even paying much attention to my own health and fitness. It was time to seek out real help.
I started seeing a therapist twice a week. Through this experience and the tools I gained, the cobwebs cleared and I began to think more clearly. She helped me to realize my true purpose and passion, that I genuinely like to help other people. Although coaching had been a part of my consultancy work for more than 20 years, I realized that I wanted to enhance my knowledge and capabilities even further, by taking the extra step of obtaining “a board coaching certification (BCC).”
Even more significantly, my therapist helped me to understand that the very common challenges and difficulties I had faced, in finding my next career move, provided me with valuable insights into how to help others do so as well—in particular to help high level executives and other performers cope with the stigma and shame that they can often feel when encountering similar challenges, in order to move past these obstacles and become more effective and confident leaders.
Some might be surprised that I am willing to share this story so openly. After all, many driven and successful professionals, including the old me, are reluctant to admit any so-called “weakness,” and are especially reluctant to ask for help. Instead, they try to tough it out and figure things out themselves, often to their detriment.
So no, for anyone who might still be wondering, nope, I am not at all self-conscious to share this story. If I am not willing to share my own struggles and experience, then why should others be willing to share with me?
To help me get started on my coaching journey, my therapist recommended I find my own coach. I had to meet with a few people to find the right coach that meshed with my personality and challenged me to assess and reach my professional goals—but once I found them, the experience was incredibly meaningful and impactful. Working with my coach, I was able to create real commitment and accountability to myself as I worked toward my own coaching board certification.
I hoped that the work I was doing and the investment I was making in myself would ultimately, exponentially, benefit my clients—and it has. With a new energy, a futuristic outlook and an actionable vision, unconvention™ was born.
So no, for anyone who might still be wondering, nope, I am not at all self-conscious to share this story! If I am not willing to share my own struggles and experience, then why should others be willing to share with me?
My own therapy and coaching helped me realize that I could not do it on my own--and I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to either. My experience confirmed for me that there is a clear path to finding or regaining one’s inner strength and confidence and reaching even higher levels of performance and joy. And I can help you to find it.
So how about you? Have you ever experienced challenges and self-doubts? Did a therapist or coach help you regain your footing? If so, what are some of the most important lessons you learned, or tools that you acquired, during that process, and how are you still applying them? Please let me know in the comments or feel free to drop me a note.
What a powerful story! Leadership truly starts with vulnerability and humility. Congrats again on the new company!